I am sitting here, in my room.
Pictures are diddling in and out, across and through my mind.
Things that have never happened.
Day dreams, of sorts.
I'm day dreaming in the middle of the night.
I am standing still on square one, a freshly chalked, giant hop scotch. This is just the beginning of the game. It's going to be tricky. The goal is to finish without falling, to aim for the best and make it there. "There," at this point, has its options. "There" is with him. "There" is successful. "There" is happy. "There" may be closer than I thought.
Along the way, Mother is going to start Chemo. I won't cast my stone too far just yet. I need to take this game slowly. Mom needs my help.
School is going to require some attention. To be successful, this is a necessary requirement.
Day dream: crushed.
I am day dreaming in the middle of the night.
I am sitting at a table, in a little kitchen nook. I am drinking fresh brewed coffee and working on writing a book. I am wearing giant fuzzy slippers, my hair is wild, and I am wearing an over sized shirt. You walk in with that smile, that smile that makes me think that I can write poetry. Poetry that will be quoted and read by college professors one day. That smile says, in a thousand ways, "I love you." It renders me speechless. The only way I can reply is with sweet kisses.
I can't wait.
I am day dreaming in the middle of the night. Iced tea and thoughts of the happy and sad things.
Day dreaming, wishing, goodnight.