numb.

World:

The ride is over. Please get off.

I don't know what to do.

I wanted so badly for everything to be okay for just a minute. Is that too much to ask? Yes. 

I gave love a chance. It was amazing until it hurt.

Sometimes, it doesn't matter how much you love something. It doesn't matter how much work you put forth, or how much you sacrifice... Sometimes when all you want is to be happy forever, forever says "SCREW YOU! I don't care how much you love him. I don't care how much it hurts. You aren't getting it. End of discussion." 

Sometimes, you have to take care of yourself. You can't take care of another person if you can't even take care of yourself. It's hard to lift yourself up when at the same time, everything else is trying to pull you under. It's exhausting. I am exhausted.

I am mad.

I am sad. 

I am confused. 

I am awake.

Can I go back to sleep now?