technology

I hate you.
You make me feel a fruster brewing in my stomach.
Power, not even scratching the surface.
You make me sick.

Not even worth a phone call.
What's wrong with that?
I'm a contradiction.
Here it is.

Here I sit.
Pasting my soul on a virtual piece of paper.
What did I do wrong?
How could you do this to me again?

Break my heart once, shame on you.
But break it twice? ... Shame on me.

Glad you learned how to text.

:) I hope you have fun in vegas.

the good old days

Back in the day, life was so simple. 

               Let's take a walk.

I went to Bruner Elementary School. Located in North Las Vegas, around the corner from Cheyenne High School, if you know where that is. Going to school was always fun and recess was never long enough. We would play Red-Rover until we got busted by a teacher because some dumb kid always got hurt. I played double dutch, which automatically made me cool. I was a Peer Mediator... and then one day I had to be "mediated." The girl deserved it, I swear.

In fourth grade, my teacher was Mrs. Bromley-Norwood. When I was in her class, it was her first year teaching in Las Vegas. She was fresh out of New York, and she never let us forget it. She tried to tell us that we said "Nevada" wrong... She pronounced it like (Ne-vod-a)... She was wrong. That was the year the Twin Towers went down. I will never forget that day. No recess. And we watched the news all day. I don't remember Mrs. Bromley Norwood speaking a single word. She drove straight to New York the next day. We had substitutes for two weeks and every single one of them was mean.

Back in the day, to be a big fifth grader was to be school royalty. People just did things for you. You were respected. Especially if you were in Mrs. Herold's class. She was my teacher. And she was the absolute best. I don't know where she is, these days. I wish I did, so she could see the woman I have become. I learned so much from her. 

it's been a minute...

It has been a minute since my thoughts last rested here. Life is finally showing some promise! I am transferring within my job to another location, getting out of this two step town. I'm getting my life in order, with a man to kiss me at my side. It's comforting, you know? To have a person there to catch you if you fall... Kind of like the game called "trust", I hope he'll stay behind me. It's a love thing.
I need some assistance, I'm taking a few leaps. I've entered the Mary Kay business and plan on being amazing at it! That is the plan.
I'm ready! Ready for this chapter. For the past little bit, my bipolar mind has been so restless. So emotional. So in need of something more. Well kids, grown ups make things happen. You can't just wait for someone to grab your hand and tell you that you could be more than you are. At this point, I am the grown up. And now all of the big hands have let me go. That is what they do. They let you go and expect your mature wings to take flight and travel across new horizons, see incredible things, and make something of what they gave you. It's my time to fly.
This week will be an adventure in itself. One little event and my life with be utterly changed. I could not be more excited!

thanks for listening.

And so it is...
~miss Rae

Most Best

a list:

• black and white movies
• puppies
• rainy days
• hookah
• when the power goes out for hours so all you do is have conversation and play games by candlelight (some of my greatest childhood memories.)
• kissing
• loosing track of time
• swimming in the ocean
• having to put the book down for a sec because it made you cry
• skinny dipping
• listening to simon and garfunkel with dad
• car rides
• chick flicks
• pay checks
• mexican food
• blasting the classic rock station on the freeway
• windows down weather
• beaches
• spontaneous picnics 
• playing at the river
• sunscreen
• smoothies
• floppy beanies
• sleepovers
• ice cold lemonade
• summer nights
• stargazing
• finding a train
• planning vacations to incredible places
• being loved
• new panties
• good night and good morning texts
• furniture stores
• hippies
• rosemary
• kittens
• antique stores
• foreigners
• zion
• home
• nieces
• the perfect outfit
• tattoos
• best homies
• cody
• charlie
• jesse
• castin
• miranda
• karly
• amanda
• jessica
• duckii
• haley
• cousins
• shad
• laura
• stephanie
• amber
• joey
• jordan
• wild flowers
• bumping in to old friends
• writing
• painting
• singing at the tops of your voices
• water
• nicki minaj
• sun glasses
• vacations
• shopping
• old photos
• elderly people telling stories of their lives
• carrot cake
• house hunting
• planting flowers and trees
• horse back riding
• plane rides
• the lake
• new shoes
• wiz khalifa
• hawaii
• piano music
• frank Sinatra
• sleep
• winky faces
• all nighters
• a full tank of gas
• days off
• iced tea
• sex and the city
• sun tans
• the breakfast club
• people who are gay and loud, and proud of it
• being more than what meets the eye
• parties
• when it rains while the sun is shining
• sex
• breakfast for dinner
• little shops
• waterfalls
• baby animals
• museums
• old photos
• saying exactly what's on your mind
• fishing
• angel's landing for the day
• flying
• cliff jumping
• old friends
• coffee dates
• celery
• new shoes
• when my boobs are doing good things
• dancing
• trying something new
• celine dion
• nail pollish
• bubble baths
• dandelions
• balloons
• the Spice Girls
• camp fires
• horses
• a new pet fish
• flushing new pet fish a few hours- a day after purchase 
• the 4th of July
• family dinners
• Blueberry Hill (on Decatur in Vegas)
• living the HI life for a bit

That's all for now, folks

~miss Rae

a true definition

What is love? 

Love is a temporary madness. It erupts like an earthquake and then subsides. And when it subsides you have to make a decision. You have to work out whether your roots have become so entwined together that it is inconceivable that you should ever part. Because this is what love is. Love is not breathlessness, it is not excitement, it is not the promulgation of promises of eternal passion. That is just being 'in love' which any of us can convince ourselves we are. Love itself is what's leftover when being in love has burned away, and this is both an art and a fortunate accident. It's when your roots grow toward each other.. And when all the pretty blossoms have fallen off your branches you find that you are one tree and not two. 

one love

And so it is... 
~miss Rae

a secret you get to know

Here is a secret that I have to tell. I don't have any secrets. Ask me to keep one? I promise, I won't. Every secret, mine or yours, will cross my lips. No lie, it is bound to happen. I cannot keep a secret because secrets clutter up my mind. They make me anxious. I start to sweat. I can't concentrate. I can't relax. I obsess over them, want to write about them... Bad news. Before you start to worry, don't, because there is a secret to my secret sharing. When I promise not to tell a soul, I mean it. I am a good person, so have no fear.

My room knows all of my secrets. It knows all of yours too. Because I whisper all of them out loud at night, before I close my eyes.. Its almost like a confession, because once I'm through, I feel that peace thing. That's a good sign, right? 

And the best news of all is that walls don't talk... So your secret is safe with me- and no one gets their weave yanked out. 

Everyone wins.

And so it is.

Thanks for listening...

~miss Rae 

Day numero Uno!

It's mid-morning, day 1 of the rest of my life. Am I excited? HELL yess. Is it about time? WAYYY past time. But have I finally found the secret and doing something about it now? Better effing believe it, folks.

Now you might be asking yourself... "What in tarnation is this wacky chick talking about?!" 

Well, my dear friends, you shall know soon enough. In fact The results will explain themselves and the only question you will then have for me is "What are you doing, and how can I do it too?!" Are you stoked? Are you just so excited for that day? Me too. It's much sooner than you would think.

Stay tuned!

And now, for your viewing (Not so Pleasurable...) A "before" Picture. I am documenting this one-HUNDO percent! Thank you for taking this journey with me. Laugh and mock at these photos all you want :) I already am! We are kissing this nasty body goodbye, and kicking it's fat ass. Le'go.

gross.

what a fatty

back boobies. sick.

MUCH LOVE!!! and so it is...

~miss Rae